Encouragement

What would I say to the prospective adoptive parents and caretakers of Baby Twin Doe who remains in the hospital in another state, born just weeks ago?  I would share our story.  A story that shares alot of health similiarities to their little boy.  Our son Tommy is Twin A, and was diagnosed prenatally with probable Down syndrome and Dandy walker malformation of the brain.  Our Twin B was perfectly healthy, just like theirs was.  At twenty weeks gestation we were told Twin A may not be born.  We were told that he may only live hours or days.  What we didn't know was that he also had a complete AV canal defect of the heart, Hirschsprung's disease, polysaccaride antibody deficiency syndrome, severe sleep apnea and would need to live off of a feeding tube for a long period of time.  What we didn't know was how little ALL of that would DEFINE who he is.  He is an almost four year old boy with a bubbly personality and knows no stranger.  He is quick to smile, quick to saddness and always quick in forgiveness.  He runs, walks, climbs, hits, hugs, smiles, laughs, and cries.  He looks at books and uses sign language.  He eats.  He loves.  He has a lifetime.  He is his own self just like all of our children.

I'm not going to offer judgment for the mom that chose life for her twins thru adoption nor the parents that chose to take the healthy twin and leave the struggling one in the hospital with a DNR.  I try hard not to judge other people.  I know how hard this is.  I live this everyday.  I believe in a loving God that will comfort and provide for all the people involved in this situation.   He has a plan for all of us.

So when that state Ds coordinator called me to ask if she could share our contact information with the staff, the case workers, the prospective adopted parents, I smiled and said I would love to share the story of Tommy.  It's a good one.